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SGT Mike Stokely, a year later

Last December, I wrote about SGT. Mike Stokley over at Moorewatch.  His father, Robert Stokely, graciously responded to me via email to thank me.  Unfortunately, I let other mail pile on top of them, and I only just found the two emails he sent me again.

Last night I went through a lot of old mail to delete things that were just taking up space.  Email with attachments, spam I missed, messages from servers, auto-responses...the clutter that accumulates.  I get around 250-500 messages a day depending on spam levels, and things often get lost or buried.

I’m kind of ashamed that I let these two slide by.  I was reminded of SGT. Stokely just the other day from this post at Blackfive.  I suppose it was serendipity that led me to re-discoverthose two email a couple of days later.

When I wrote at length over the last year about Casey Sheehan and his mother, and by extension about how I felt a parent could - not should, but rather could - grieve for their child and not cross lines of taste, decorum, honesty and sanity, Robert Stokely was the man I kept in mind.  The things he said about Mike, the way he talked about him as a person, they way it was always about Mike and not any political agenda...these are the kinds of things that struck me as good and decent and above all, honorable.  Whenever I read an email that Robert sent to someone for their site, I felt like he was honoring his son as a person and a soldier.

It is sad that a man who inspired such love and pride in his father was lost to us, but at the same time if anything good can come from this kind of loss, it’s that sense of honor, dignity and love.  I hope other people can see it.

Nothing illustrated it more than this story:

It is an irony that you can have so much grief interspersed with such pride swelling in your heart even as tears well in your eyes, and still be able to laugh.  The memory of the very loved we had lost was caught in a moment Mike would have found humorous, and laughed himself that special laugh he had.  As we traveled the highway through Loganville that day of his “welcome home parade”, and again to the church for his funeral, many businesses had posted a tribute to Mike on their sign boards.  Our favorite and one to be remembered for all time, was at a small meat market and said this:

“IN HONOR OF MIKE STOKELY”
pork ribs $1.69 lb.

Although they probably didn’t mean it to come out that way, we loved it, and laughed a much needed, deep down laugh.  Mike would have loved it and probably thought this business was the only one with any sense left, given all the fuss being made over him.  Forever more, whenever I see pork ribs, I will think of that day and what we now call the “Mike Stokely Special”.

A few days past a year later, and I still think about Mike Stokely and everyone else who gives up time, health, safety and sometimes their lives in service to their country as warriors.

I only hope that we can someday deserve what they do for us.

Mr. Stokely, if you should see this, I apologize for my lack of response and lack of respect in not paying more attention to your email.

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