ATTENTION ALL MOOREWATCHERS: Don’t do this

Someone just emailed me a photoshopped joke image that puts Mama Moonbat’s head on some fat naked chick with a guy’s finger up the ass and Moore’s head on the guy.

It says “We’ll pull out when you do.” Ha.  Very...funny.  However, what is not amusing was putting our URL on the image as though we made it or released it.  IF YOU SEE THIS THING ANYWHERE, MOOREWATCH HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE CREATION.

Let me restate that in simple terms: We did not make this. There are three people who are “authorized” (so to speak) to speak for this website, and none of them did this.  If you are a fan of the site and you decided to help us out by slapping the URL on there...don’t.  You aren’t helping.  We’ll do the jokes with our name on them, thank you very much.

Of course it might not be a fan...that’s certainly not anything new, creating something stupid to try to embarrass someone you don’t like.  It would be right up a Moore fan’s alley to create a lie and attribute it falsely to another in the hopes of using that lie to paint their enemy in a bad light.

Whatever the story is...it’s not ours.

Site stuff

Some of you may have noticed, and judging by my inbox, a lot of you, a new sponsor in the Blogads to the right hand side.  Someone has purchased an ad that heavily touts the progressive/liberal perspective.  And I ran it.  As we’ve always said...we’ll take your money, right or left or in-between.  So check ‘em out...who knows, maybe they have a point or two.

Also...top right corner you’ll see a link to the new iLounge.com downloadable book.  Last time they ran a contest, you people were AWESOME and you won it for me.  This time YOU can benefit.  The grand prize is a bunch of iPod shuffles to give away...and I’ll gladly give them away if I win, I wish I had more stuff to give away in contests and the like.

Basically all you have to do is click the link once every couple days.  Don’t do it constantly, I don’t want to cheat, but if you happen to click from home and work...well...that’s not cheating.  The book is WELL worth the download as well if you are interested in or own an iPod or other digital player.

If I win, I will split the lot between Moorewatch and my podcast...I will keep one of the shuffles just to play around with, but give everything else away.  So...click...and tell a friend!

Not off topic: The Starkcast 015

This week’s show has a nice little Moore feature.

DISCLAIMER: If you are Christian (any form thereof) and you are offended by the use of religious icons in comedy, please do not download this program.  At all.  It will offend you.  You were warned.  Don’t complain if you decide to listen.

Get it here in MP3 or here in bookmarkable AAC.

TOPICS

- Vote for me at Podcast Alley!
- Patrick Melton is mad at me!  Oh noes!  Emily gets pissed.
- Your voicemails
- Another shot at The Aristocrats joke
- Jesus is back from the dead, and boy is he pissed
- Secret footage of Michael Moore’s unreleased documentary
- Two Minute Rant: Stuff that is obvious, like politicians sucking and military personnel not being children
-Show Close: I’m clearly not well, more voicemails, Sean D. should stop listening, goodbye.  Again, nothing happens after I say goodbye.  Nothing at all.

Update
Also, in Page Six gossip news:

August 23, 2005— THERE may soon be less of Michael Moore. The portly propagandist is doing a stint at the Pritikin Longevity Center & Spa in Aventura, Fla. — also known as the “fat farm for the rich.” Moore is learning how to cook healthy meals and exercise and attending classes on “life re-education.” The program starts at $3,800 a week and promises enrolees they’ll “learn a new approach to eating,” “never have to diet again,” and can lose up to 12 pounds in the first three weeks. The facility also has “cosmetic/medical treatments, such as intense pulsed light, botox injections, and Restylane.”

Good luck, Mikey.  We sure do need you around for many more years, making shit up and giving us all plenty to work with.  Good loss-ing!

Sort of OT - Starkcast 014

Casey Sheehan featured in this week’s Two Minute Rant.  Thanks to Friend of USA (it was you right?) for the great omlettes/eggshells line!  See it all here.

Also, if you could take a second...Vote for me at Podcast Alley.  I could really use the boost.  I’ll love you forever!  ;)

The Starkcast #013

It’s like giving birth to a fully grown adult made of...well...excrement, really.  Lucky show 13 ready for flushing sirs and madams!

Get it here in MP3 or here in bookmarkable AAC.

TOPICS

- Vote for me at Podcast Alley or I’ll kill six puppies and three kittens every half hour.  Kind of like PETA.
- Who is Emily?
- A fellow fighter in the war against sentient podcasting machines who get all uppity after reading Noam Chomsky and watching Michael Moore movies: Greg from Sound Off.
- Vulva Original (Warning: Not safe for work or kids even though it’s a commercial product site)
- Robert Blake tried to have his first wife killed and was planning to blame it on the Manson Family
- B. Bocephus Jackson schools us on Charles Manson
- An exclusive interview with Robert Novak
- Two Minute Rant - Actually three and a half and it’s all about why Rick Santorum is a very poor American Senator.
- Show close - Vote for me at Podcast Alley .  Remember the puppies kittens.  Your voice mails, Noble creeps me out again and nothing else at all.  That’s the end of the show.  I say goodbye and there can’t be anything after that because the show is over.

Tech note

Just a note to let comment posters know I upgraded the little buttons that let you post code like bold, italics, quotes etc.  The old way, if there was text in your paragraph already, the tags apepared at the end of the text no matter what.  Now you can highlight the text and click the approriate button and the code wraps itself around the text you highlighted.

This should help you folks who can’t seem to get the quote function to work.  Just copy & paste the text you want to quote, highlight it and hit the quote button.  Presto-chango, you get nicely formatted quoted text.

Comments are open mic.

Call to action

Ok folks, this is what we do.  Here’s the skinny:

The Blob is in town with his “non-political” film festival, and the local
liberal paper is having love-spasms. I volunteered to work as a “security”
person at Genie Aldrich’s counter-festival which is showing “Michael Moore
Hates America” on Friday night. I am looking for quotes from the Blob that I
can print and hand out to the lefties. I remember him calling Americans
“stupid” in the foreign press, but I can’t find it. Can you help me locate
some telling quotes? I’d like to put this together today, if possible.

Thanks,

Daniel Sanderson

You know what to do.  Find the choice stuff, in context with citation as to source, and drop it in the comments.  I’ll point Daniel to this thread.  Let’s roll.  ;)

The Starkcast #011

Like a freshly killed deer, this cute and furry show lies before you, ready for the gutting.

Get it here in MP3 or here in bookmarkable AAC.

TOPICS

- Featured in iTunes Podfinder! (I think I disgusted Adam Curry)(link opens in iTunes)
- Ian’s a little bitch
- I sing you a song
- Greg wants to hump my computer
- My computer wants to hump Greg
- More voicemails
- Go to the Apple stores and subscribe this show on all their machines!
- Politics, GTA and asinine Senators
- Politics, Supreme Court Nominees and asinine websites
- Judge John Roberts: The Disco Assfucker?
- The Smythe & Welson Cross & Die 2300
- The Aristocrats
- My version of the Aristocrats
- Show close: Figuring out Noble Brown, PodAlliance, James Doohan, James Lileks’ Scotty tribute song ‘Up Your Shaft.”

Get the GTA Hot Coffee sex mod video here.

Comments are eitehr on the topics listed, or reader’s choice.  Enjoy!

Moore fans are some of the biggest assholes around

You may have noticed an ad has gone missing from the right side of the page.  It was the one for EarphoneSolutions.com.  WHICH I GAVE THEM FOR FREE, YOU IDIOTIC MOORE FANS.

Why is it gone?  Because the scumbags who worship Senor Scumbag wouldn’t leave the poor owner alone.  They sent harassing hate mail because he dared associate with us.  He’s a good man who doesn’t need the stress, so he asked me to take the ad down.  Of course I did because I don’t want to cause him any trouble.

Yeah, they REALLY believe in freedom, right?  Funny how it’s “a chill wind of censorship” when it happens to Linda Ronstadt, but they have no qualms about trying to fuck up a little business arrangement where no goddamned money was even changing hands.  Fucking scumbags.  HEY MOORE-ONS: One can only hope that you get what you deserve one day...bitches like you always do. 

My apologies to Flavio for the problems, and hey, if you are in the market for audio stuff want to do business with a REALLY great guy who goes above and beyond to take care of you, hit up EarphoneSolutions.com or his main site, FMAsolutions.com.

In response to this, I have decided to hold the very first…

Big BlogAd Blowout!

I have slashed the prices on our blogads to the point where you can afford to buy one for any damn thing.  $10 for a week.  $18 for two.  $35 for a month and $100 for three months.  Why not buy an ad today?  Buy so many ads these Moore-ons will have to spend all day trying to find time to write to everyone and complain.  And readers!  Click on the ads.  Consider buying something from one of our supporters.  Let ‘em feel the love…

New stuff

I just pulled off the upgrade to this site.  Hopefully a ton of little bugs will be fixed now.  Also...NEW FORUMS!  If you are a member of the main site and can post comments, you can post in the new forums.  One login, one registration.  One database to rule them all!

New forums: http://moorewatch.com/index.php/forums/

Congratulations!

Fellow Moorewatcher yngcelt just shared some great news in the comments to a recent post.

Posted by yngcelt on 07/09 at 02:20 AM

Aloha! Sorry I havent posted since Wednesday or so, but I’d like to announce something positive that happened in the midst of all the tragedy and death of the attacks in London.  On Thursday July 7th at 11:47am Hawaii Time, my daughter Emily Rose was born into the world.  She and mommy are doing fine and we are home now getting much needed rest.
I’d like to think that in this world there can be a balance of life and death.  37(last I heard) lives were lost in London this week and the sorrow and pain that their families and loved ones are feeling I wouldn’t wish on anyone.
But I also know that on Thursday, my daughter was one of 10 babies born on that day here in Hawaii.  In all modesty and sincerity, I offer my condolences and my prayers to the families of those lost in London while I also thank God for the births of so many lives at the same time.

Congratulations!  Here’s to mommy and your new baby, and I don’t know first-hand, but from what I hear...get used to never sleeping again until she’s about 23.  :)

Do me a favor wouldja?

Let ‘em know.  They bettah reck-o-nize.  ;)

OT The Starkcast #007

Show #7 wants to fill up your earhole like Peter North fills a...well, you know.

Get it here in MP3 or here in bookmarkable AAC.

TOPICS

- Someone stole Nicholas Cage’s old email account.  Or did they?  Plus, Cage sends me dirty email and I’m forced to kill him
- Tom Cruise is crazy, that much is clear.  But where was Katie for 16 days?
- Name That Movie!
- The Kelo decision and the flag desecration amendment, and how they are symptoms of the decline of America as a great society.
- Two Minute Rant on - swearing!
- George Lucas Raped Our Childhood was done by Hot Waffles. *NOTE CORRECTION FROM URL IN THE SHOW - The correct URL is http://www.hotwafflesmusic.com
- If I build it, will they PayPal?
- PodAlliance in the hizzy fo’ shizzy.  Again, not the proper name as opposed to what I said in the show.  :)

OT The Starkcast #006

The new show is up and ready for you.  A Moore-on called a couple weeks ago about the Downing Street nonsense.  Billy from Philly: It’s on, beeyotch.

Comments can either be on the topics in the latest show or Open Mic.  Have at them!

Moore roundup, Patriot’s Journey, OT

I know I have been slacking off on the Patriot’s Journey posts.  I’ll do better.  In the meantime, the second-to-last item in this roundup counts for today.  :)

OK, here’s a few interesting tidbits…

- First up, sent in by about a half-ton of people, a good, comprehensive review of Jesse Larner’s new book ”Moore and Us: One Man’s Quest for a New World Order.”

I wasn’t expecting an awful lot from Larner’s book, since his politics are so far to the Left. As you’ll see from the Q&A below, he hates George W. Bush almost as much as Moore does, and this leads him into some laboured rants against the forces of darkness. But to his credit, he refuses to ignore uncomfortable facts about the Left’s favourite all-round polemicist. His verdict is detailed and damning. Moore’s admirers have long had a habit of shrugging off attacks as the work of the grand right-wing conspiracy. It won’t be so easy this time.

I ordered a copy, but it seems to be UK only, so who knows how long it will take to arrive.  I’ll post a review as soon as I have finished it though.  In the mean time, that lnk to the book takes you to Amazon.co.uk, and we don’t get a cut if you buy it, the reviewer I linked does.

- Next up, sent in by many of you as well, Mikey is helping with a film festival.

Michael Moore is helping develop a yearly film festival for this northern Michigan tourist town that will include free outdoor showings of all-time favorites on a large waterfront screen.

Among the classics being considered: “Jaws,” “Rebel Without a Cause,” and “Casablanca.” But no “Fahrenheit 9/11.”

The Traverse City Film Festival Committee, with Moore as chairman, received permission from city commissioners Monday to use a municipal park adjacent to Lake Michigan’s Grand Traverse Bay for the outdoor viewings during the inaugural festival, scheduled for July 28-31.

The park, known as the Open Space, also is the primary setting for the National Cherry Festival in early July. The films will be shown on a 49-foot-by 24-foot inflatable screen.

So far so good.  If Moore keeps his word, and we all know how valuable his word is, then I commend him for this.  I ain’t the only one doubting Mikey’s word, however…

Some people at the meeting weren’t convinced.

“You’re going to be driving past it and you’re going to be watching political propaganda,” Mary Ann Galic said.

Local citizens should decide what films are shown on public property, said Genie Aldrich, another Traverse City resident.

“This is not Podunk USA and we do not need outsiders coming in here telling what is good for us,” Aldrich said.

It’s amazing how little trust Moore’s fellow Michigan residents have in him.  Oh wait...he’s not a resident of Michigan.  Hey, that would explain the “outsiders” reference from Aldrich.  :)

- Next...did anyone else notice Moore made the nominee list for the Discovery Channel’s “Greatest American” thing?  WTF?  By what stretch of the imagination does a lying, opportunistic pile of human fecal waste like Moore deserve to be on a list with George Washington?  WHo made that stupid list?  Luckily he went nowhere in the voting.  I’m slightly appalled as some of those who made it in to the top 25 though.  Dubya?  a “Greatest?” No, sorry.  Oprah?  Billy Graham?  Fucking Bill Clinton?  On what planet are these people examples of our “greatest” Americans?

But that’s the beauty of America, folks.  You’re free to make up dumb polls and just as free to vote stupidly in them without fear that the police will come and take you away if you don’t vote for Glorious Leader.

- Lastly, my new podcast is up.  Nothing at all to do with Moore, but damn fine entertainment anyway. :)

The Starkcast #004

Show number 4 is up! See show notes for topics and links.

OT: Podcast news

OK, I have been cutting audio and writig stuff all day and there’s no frigging way I’m going to be able to prepare *and* record a Starkcast today.

So, looks like people could squeeze in some voice mail calls if they were so inclined...say anything you want, as long as it’s funny.  Or angry, angry is almost as good as funny.  :)

206-600-5465 <- THAT’S THE RIGHT NUMBER I PROMISE. :)

Call, bitches.  ‘fo I smack that ho ass ya dig?  Bettah bring me my cheddah ya skank ass hootchie.

Needless to say, comments are open mic.  :)

The Starkcast #003

The Starkcast #003 is up...

OT: Please leave your name, number and a brief message after the beep…

I’m gearing up to produce The Starkcast #3, and I just wanted to remind you all that I have a voice mail number for you to abuse.

1-206-600-JIMK (5465)

Planned topics:

-A little on Star Wars Ep. 3 (a slightly spoileriffic review)
- iTunes enhancements, iPods, podcasting, Paris Hilton (trust me it all ties in!)
-South Park Conservatives reviewed (the book)

The SPC review will cover a lot of ground about the liberal/conservative media, pop culture, gay culture, the intellectual honesty of authors, news people and filmmakers, etc.

If you have thoughts on any of this stuff, it just might be useful, so give the voice mail a call.

1-206-600-JIMK (5465)

Consider the comments open mic.  Talk about the above stuff, your underwear or whatever.

*UPDATE*

I’m not too bright.  I have been touting the WRONG FRIGGING NUMBER.

206-600-5465.  five four six five.

Boy do I feel dumb.

OT: My first podcast

I decided to get my feet wet in the podcasting arena...You can see the fruits of my labor here: Starkcast.com.  Have at it!

Consider this an open-topic comments thread as well.